Night time and Day Time

Night time- It's a cozy,cuddly time for us. Since the beginning night has never been the hard time. I know a lot of people say night is when they cry themselves to sleep and night is when they stay awake wondering. Night was never like that for me. Night time has always been the time where I am most comfortable. Most at peace with this card life has dealt me. Night time is when I cozy up with my babes and snuggle close and kiss and hug and tell them it will all be OK. Night time is just our time. No one else is interfering. It's just me, my hubs and my babes. Night time is when I realize that, when it all boils down to it, none of this crap matters. What matters is I have two beautiful daughters who I love more then anything. It doesn't matter what my neighbor or friend or family or stranger might think of us, of her. It doesn't matter that some people can be real jerks. None of it matters. What matters is right then. That night. Where we can just be.

 

Then there is day time. Most days it's all fine and dandy. Others it's a struggle making it through the day. It's hard to turn on the TV and see shows about these wondrous births. It's hard to hear others talk about what their typical baby is doing. Sure I had all that, I had all that typical crap with Aubs, so maybe it shouldn't bother me. But it does. No one wants this. No one wants their child to be delayed. Sure I know some moms say "I wouldn't take away the DS" ..well I'm calling your bluff because I know deep down NO mother wants their child to have a tougher time. Even if the challenges are few and far and very simple, you still don't want your child to have them.

Day time is a time where people get a chance to prove themselves and sadly most people in our life have failed us. Maybe we should not have had such high expectations for people but I'm the kind of person who usually looks at the bright side of things. We have three different kids of people. Those who act like our baby is totally typical and nothing major has happened in our lives. Those who say really stupid, rude things. Then there are those who are great and who are supportive. It's  a  shame that people are afraid to talk to us. It's a shame that people don't acknowledge my daughters existence. It's a shame loving family/friends can't find it in themselves to ask how we are doing. It's like they can't handle the raw emotion of it. They are so afraid I might cry and they will feel awkward. Well guess what? You feeling awkward for 20 minutes of your life is NOTHING compared to the reality of what my life will be forever. Can you get past your selfishness for two seconds and realize that? People show their true colors in hard times.....But I will try and just focus on my beautiful babes. I love them and they will never fail me.